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Teenagers should get paid for doing household chores (Сочинения ЕГЭ английский язык)

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Nowadays people are getting more and more concerned about that teens have to pay for doing household responsibilities. If children help mother and father with cleaning, washing dishes, and watering plants that parents should give money them. (37)

My personal view is that teenagers sometimes can get money for doing household chores. Firstly, the younger generation is learn work and earn money. They understand that their labour is paid and they try to do their work high quality. Also, children learn to manage money. Secondly, if work is hard, for example, paint the fence, dig big territory of kitchen-garden, so parents encourage teens because they spent a lot of energy and power. Finally, thanks to the encouragement teenagers have got motivations and incentives to work. (87)

On the other hand, we can observe that when a child realizes that he is paid for work, he will do household chores only because of the benefits.

So children often lie to get money or even get angry at their parents for not paying. (45)

I disagree with this position because many children understand that mum and dad wanted to make them happy by paying their labour. These parents explain teens why they gave such as sum of money and that their labour is paid. (40)

In conclusion, I can say that parents should pay for doing household chores because they give children joy, teach them to take care of their work and money. (28)

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Оценка эксперта:

К1 (решение коммуникативной задачи) – 2 балла

Коммуникативная задача решена, но имеется ряд замечаний:

1) в первом абзаце нет чёткой формулировки противоборствующих позиций;

2) из-за неправильного грамматического оформления аргумент, содержащийся в предложении Secondly, …, выглядит странно;

3) в третьем абзаце противоположное мнение заявлено недостаточно чётко, т.е. автор как будто бы продолжает собственную мысль;

4) в нарушение нейтрального стиля используется разговорная лексика: teen (следует заменить на teenager/youngster/young person), thanks to (следует заменить на due to), mum and dad (следует заменить на mother and father).

К2 (организация текста) – 3 балла

В целом текст организован корректно.

К3 (лексика) – 0 баллов

1) concerned about that – concerned about the fact that;

2) watering plants that parents – watering plants, parents;

3) should give money them – should give money to them;

4) so parents encourageparents encourage;

5) do their work high quality – do their work with high quality;

6) by paying their labour – by paying for their labour;

7) explain teens – explain to teenagers;

8) such as sum – such a sum.

К4 (грамматика) – 0 баллов

1) have to pay for doing – have to be paid for doing;

2) the younger generation is learn work and earn money – the younger generation learn(s) to work and earn money;

3) if work is hard – if the work is hard;

4) for example, paint the fence, dig big territory of kitchen-garden – for example, painting the fence, digging a big territory of the kitchen garden;

5) because they spent a lot of energy – because they spend a lot of energy;

6) motivations and incentives to workmotivation and incentive to work;

7) that he is paid for work, he will – that he or she is paid for work, he or she will / that they are paid for work, they will;

8) get angry at their parents – get angry with their parents;

9) for not payingfor not being paid.

К5 (орфография и пунктуация) – 1 балл

1) watering plants that parents should give – watering plants, parents should give;

2) kitchen-gardenkitchen garden;

3) thanks to the encouragement teenagersdue to the encouragement, teenagers;

4) So children often lie – So, children often lie;

5) labour (BrE), realizes (AmE) [Желательно соблюсти единообразие в стиле написания].

Слабое место работы – лексическое наполнение и грамматическое оформление. Ошибок столь много, что подробно комментировать каждую в отдельности нецелесообразно. Автору необходимо хотя бы бегло повторить курс школьной грамматики, а также освежить лексику.

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