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Studying online is more interesting than at school (Сочинения ЕГЭ английский язык)

12 из 14
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There are groups of people who lead heated disputes between themselves whether to go in the online mode of educating or keep on studying traditional way. And nowadays this question has become a real stumbling block.

What concerns me, I would rather like to keep things the way they are for now and study by going to schools like it has always been. The main positive difference in favour of it is that it is usually a way more pleasant to communicate with people live than to do via electronic devices. Besides, there can not happen any technical problems between people while chatting as they basically would not occur. And moreover, the traditional way of sudyig provides more effective and productive results in the very end.

However, there are people who stand for online studying and appreciate innovative approach to it.

The first reason for them to think so is mainly the widespread opinion that such way provides more open space for both students and teachers and improves the studying quality. Finally they also think that it would rid both sides from the famous «forgot at home» thing.

Anyway, it is still considered that the traditional studying system is superior to its computerized counterpart for its proven over the years steadiness and reliability, so this is the best way to educate people.

To conclude what I have said before, I would like to emphasize that even nowadays traditional educational system remains the most used and reliable, and it has in total a way more advantages than the electronic one.

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Оценка эксперта:

К1 - решение коммуникативной задачи. Аспект 4 - контраргументы. Рекомендуется, чтобы контраргументы были противоположны собственным аргументом, то есть нужно выразить несогласие с собственным мнением.

Контраргумент хотелось бы сделать конкретнее, изначально не совсем понятно о чем конкретно идет речь.

К2 - организация. Из-за неточности в контраргументе и его оправдании в параграфе 4, снижен балл за логичность.

К3 - лексика.

К4 - грамматика.

Орфография и пунктуация - есть одна неточность в постановке запятой.

Вы пишете: "Anyway, it is still considered that the traditional studying system is superior to its computerized counterpart for its proven over the years steadiness and reliability, so this is the best way to educate people". Необходимо разделить предложение, начать второе предложение с "So, ...".

В целом:

К1 - 2

К2 - 2

К3 - 3

К4 - 3

К5 - 2

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